Sunday, March 13, 2011

The Best Part of Cloning Trees? Now, I can Command an Army of Trees Like Those From the Wizard of Oz!

You know what I love more than genetically replicated sheep? No, I am not talking about the foot soldiers from the Star Wars prequel trilogy... They sucked. How about cloned Redwoods and Sequoias? My naivety is kind of alarming on the subject of tree cloning. Much like Yahoo! news' target demographic, I was thoroughly surprised (and excited) at a scientist's ability to do this.

Why? Oh, you know why... The usual reasons. Frankly, when I go into the park next to my house, I make a beeline to the first tree and I (you guessed it) hug it. In fact, I hug the sweet hell out of it. I have racked up some mighty fine restraining orders for this behavior. Of which, I am still curious how a tree made it to the local court house to file them or a judge who would actually grant them.

Many of you are wondering why this is an interesting development. The answer is simple, it allows for the continuation of a specific species of tree should it no longer be able to propagate. Yes, yes, trees get it on with either the wind or insects... No, it is not as hot as one might think. It also will act as a countermeasure to the logging industry which in certain places is well... Out of Control.

This is where I hear the p'ting of a spittoon and am posed the following question... "Who gives a damn?" Well, do you like have sweet sweet oxygen in your lungs? How about lower land temperatures because you know I love 90 degrees in the first week in March. That was sarcasm, I in fact hate 90 degrees in March. As for oxygen, I could take it or leave it. Anyway, trees account for twenty-five percent of all plant species and being able to replenish lost populations via tree cloning is a great idea. Now, I can put a Redwood in my backyard and enjoy its sweet majesty until its roots destroy my foundation.

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